Do you think that if Jesus had not gone through with dying on the cross, God would have loved him any less?
For the past month or so, I have been watching the Gilmore Girls series. I know that we all have mixed responses towards this show and it is not my aim to convince you to like it. I also know that it may not be the best place to get a glimpse of how real life ought to be. I mean, what percentage of the mother daughter world have a relationship like the one Lorelai and Rory share? The two relate like friends, love the same things, speak fast and share a reasoning that goes over the head of many. And they dress well while doing so. In seasons 1 to 5, I think, Rory barely has conversations with her boyfriends unless they are arguing about something and so we are all left thinking that the quality of your relationship is directly proportional to the amount of time you spend kissing (and arguing). In the show, all rich adults are presented as out of touch with reality, manipulative and entitled while rich kids are presented as irresponsible adrenaline chasers. This is not the show to watch to pull life lessons from.
Or is it?
This morning I realized something. This is one show about a mom who loves her child fiercely. In between the rapid fire conversations, flashes of fashion and crazy antics is a story of a woman, Lorelai, who totally and completely loves her child and would do anything to ensure that she gives her the best that life can offer. If the best means taking her daughter, Rory, to private school so that she will get a better shot at getting into an Ivy league university, she will do it. She, Lorelai goes back to her parents to borrow money for private school. As a result, you see her barely wade through humiliation, criticism and judgement of her own mother over several Friday night dinners. In the end, Rory makes it to an Ivy League university and you think yep, it was worth it.
Rory makes it to Yale and has a year full of interesting happenings, one of which causes her to decide to quit school. This girl who has always loved school from kindergarten. This girl who loved school so much that she reportedly lied to her mom so that she could get to kindergarten at 6am, quits Yale at the end of her first year. To say that her mother is horrified at the turn of events is an understatement. Everything that they both worked towards has been flushed down the toilet. Fiery hurtful words are exchanged and the mother-daughter relationship that was the envy of the small town is no more. The daughter moves out and the two no longer talk.
We, who are watching the program however, get to see each one’s point of view. It was through this episode that I realized that Lorelai though hurt by and disappointed by the choice her kid has made, never once stops loving her. She may have chosen not to speak to Rory, see her and dump her stuff at her grandparent’s home but she never stops loving her. You see, all along, I watched Lorelai do her best to support Rory through bad choices. I saw her disappointment when Rory lost her virginity to her married ex-boyfriend, Dean. I watched her wish she could disappear when she saw Dean and his wife have a fight and breakup because of what had happened between Rory and Dean. However, even though she disapproved of Rory’s choices, Lorelai stood up for her daughter when they ran into Dean’s ex-wife and mother. So when Rory chose to quit school and moved out of home to her grandparent’s, although this seemed to be the end of a once close and enviably happy relationship, I knew that her mom would not stop loving her.
You might say that of course I knew this because I have watched the series two times already and so I know how it will end. That might be true. But I am certain that in this, the TV show mirrors life. As a mother, I do not think that there is anything that my sons would do that would make me stop loving them. They may make choices that will disappoint me, they might do things that I disapprove of and we will definitely have arguments about their choices but I do think that I will stop loving them. I might stop relating with them, but that does not mean that I will stop loving them.
Thus the question that I asked at the beginning of the article, Would God have loved Jesus less if he, Jesus, had not gone through with dying on the cross?
What is the first thought that comes to your mind when you read that? Blasphemy! Jesus came to save us all. We know that he just had to do what he was sent to! There is no way he would not have gone through with what he was sent to do! My question to you, who might be having all these thoughts is Why then did Jesus agonize in the garden? Think about it. We only agonize over something we do not want to do or we do not think we have what it takes to do.
Maybe you did not ask any of those questions instead your answer was a quick and resounding “No!” After all, there is this verse that captures what God thinks about his own son.
As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” Matthew 3:16-17
When the above happens, all we know about Jesus was the story of his birth, his family’s flight to Egypt and him calling his mother “Woman!” after she chastise him when he was 13. After that… nothing; until this moment when his cousin baptized him. Jesus had yet to heal, lead a motley crew of 12, cast demons, feed 5,000, raise the dead or tell anyone that their sins were forgiven. God chose to tell him, in public, that he loves him before he had done all these things.
This is why my answer to the question is No. However, I would be remiss not to add that even though I say that my answer is no, I am hesitant. If God’s love for his son is not performance driven, then what have I believed about God’s love for me? Would God still love me if I failed? If I watched Gilmore Girls until 1 am when I know that I need to wake up early the next day to study? Would God still love me if He realizes that all the TV watching that I am doing is the escape that I have chosen, the busyness that I am choosing, the running away from all the things that I need to do to grow spiritually, mentally, physically?
I hate to answer the question with a “yes, God will still love me” because I think that this will give me the excuse that I need to continue to indulge in the mind numbing activity of TV watching. So I switch off the TV and attempt to get some studying done. Hoping to tick off less hours of TV watching and a few more hours of gainful activity on my day’s schedule. Hoping that that will make me feel less like a failure. Conscious of the fact that I am using my performance to guide how accepting of myself I am. And by extension, how accepting God is of me.